A few weeks ago, my roommate passed along an inspiring commencement speech that British author Neil Gaiman recently gave at the University of the Arts. The clip I’d like to highlight is from 3:22 to 4:40.
If you can’t watch the video clip (at work? Preach), I’ll summarize. Gaiman discusses his somewhat unorthodox path to success and he credits a mantra he adopted as a young writer. Think of who you want to be—an accomplished celloist, a published author, an award-winning filmmaker—and envision it as a mountain on the horizon. Each time you’re faced with a tough life decision, ask yourself:
“Will X bring me closer to my mountain or further away from it?” X can be any number of life decisions, depending on your specific mountain: a promotion at work, a marriage proposal, enrolling in grad school, moving cross-country, to name just a handful.
Toward your mountain, or away. Brilliantly simple.
I’m placing my imaginary mountain in the Rockies (photo: summit of a hike in Indian Peaks Wilderness out of Boulder, CO)
The hardest task may be choosing a goal to be your mountain, or guiding north star. I bet some people have a handful of mountains, based on different facets of their lives, such as family, relationships, and work. But I think it’s important to have one overarching goal that takes precedence over the rest.
Do you want to lose 100 lbs? Write novels for a living? Buy a vacation home in North Carolina? Find the love of your life? Have 8 kids? Retire by 50? Whatever it is, according to Gaiman, make it your mountain and never lose sight of it.
He goes onto deliver more insightful advice in his 20-minute speech, but I’m stuck firmly on this whole mountain shebang.
Because, in my opinion, when you make decisions with your mountain in mind, you eliminate the human tendency toward “drifting.”
A flashy buzzword for a centuries-old concept, drifting was introduced into our lexicon by social psychologist Gretchen Rubin in her book The Happiness Project. Drifting describes a life created by a series of indecisions, or inaction, rather than conscious decisions. (Click here to take Rubin’s “Are You Drifting” quiz.)
Drifting is often the culprit behind the anxiety you experience when you feel as if you’re not living your “right” life. Only you can decide what that “rightness” entails. But if you awake one morning and think, “Is this really my life? How did I get here?”, that panicky feeling likely means you’ve drifted, or strayed from your intended course—whether it was into a mediocre relationship, a dead-end job, or an ill-fitting city. That’s drift, and according to Rubin, it’s a huge happiness suck.
Which is why I’ve latched onto Neil Gaiman’s pearl of wisdom. I think the mountain metaphor acts as an antidote to drift. Set your course toward your personal mountain—and strong head winds, obstacles, and detours be damned—you just might get there.
“I knew that as long as I kept walking toward the mountain, I’d be alright.” – Neil Gaiman
photo: summit of a hike on Deer Mountain in Rocky Mountain National Park
Love it!
Thank you, Nicole!
I love Neil Gaiman as a writer, and now as a speaker too. Thanks for this- it’s good advice for the new year!
Thanks, Nikki, I thought so too!
This is great, love how you wrote this post.
Thank you so much.
Brilliant writing, Jorie! I loved loved loved this, and I’m so glad you found this article so inspiring. I knew you would.
xo
Thanks again for inspiring this whole post, Amy! I love when you pass along insightful links
Miss Jorie, what is your mountain?
Thanks for launching that gchat yesterday, Jill. We’ve both got some quality mountains ahead of us
I am such a drifter when it comes to my professional life. I know I am, and it’s a goal of mine in 2013 to combat it and stop it. My one major obstacle in achieving that goal though is discovering my mountain. I genuinely don’t know what it is, or what I really want to do with my life. Curse being a libra! Indecisiveness is at my core :-/
I can sympathize, Meghan. I think discovering your “mountain” is the toughest part. The good news is, I think your mountain can evolve as you grow older and your interests change. You still have plenty of time to figure it out!
Good post. I think your mountain can change as you grow and experience the valleys and mountains of life. I have always wondered if your whole life is focused on achieving one thing what happens then you achieve it. Do you make a new mountain? Like if you want to be President and say you are and then what do you do? You want to win an Olympic Gold medal and you do? Or you want to be a writer and then you reach the New York Times Best Seller List several times? Does the excite wear off? I guess you could keep adding snow caps to your mountain? Sorry, just part of my thought process in finding my joy in life.
You raise a very interesting point! I think once you reach the summit of your mountain, you have to define a new goal to reach—although that must be hard, if your mountain was becoming the POTUS. Everything after that must feel a bit downhill, huh?
I have seen that before and just loved it. I have never heard of this drifting idea but what a cool concept. I am not sure if I am drifter, I think I am with connecting my thoughts and actions if that makes sense
“Drifting” was a new concept to me too, Alex. I feel like it is definitely something to watch out for in different facets of your life. It’s funny, though, because I feel like by just knowing what it is and being aware of it, you’re much less likely to actually drift!
Very cool… and I hate to admit it… but I’m drifting and not in the right direction!
Well, that’s the beauty of it, Emily! Once you recognize that behavior, you can definitely try and take steps to prevent the drift, or reset your course towards your mountain. It’s never too late to correct your course!
I know what you mean… so far I’ve managed to turn around and at least face mountain now!
I have a read a bunch of Gaiman’s stuff but never seen this speech. Like most great things, Gaiman’s mountain metaphor is brilliant because of its simplicity. The tough part is that the road to that mountain is never a straight line. Great post, thanks for sharing.
Thank you, Will! Couldn’t have said it better myself: Gaiman’s simplistic messages just resonate louder.
Great post! Thanks for sharing the Neil Gaiman video. The message of “do what you are meant to do no matter what” is so important especially for people who choose a career in the arts. The obstacles of “drifting” are very real and it’s good to get a reminder to get back on track every once and a while.
Absolutely, Rachel! It’s a vital message for people in the arts. I once read a quote that reminds me of it. I’m paraphrasing but: “A painter must paint, a writer must write, a dancer must dance, if they are to feel at peace with themselves.” I think anyone with a creatively wired mind feels that in his or her bones.
I absolutely love this post. It’s a great way to put things in perspective and to keep things in focus. I’m going to have to watch that video when I get home. Yes, I am one of those people who can’t watch it at work!
Hope you got something good out of it, Natalie!
A Thinker of a Post today – A Great Thinker though!!! I am drifting, coasting, treading right now in my professional life. I hope to go towards the mountain in a few months time – do have a goal in mind. Have a Great One:)
That’s excellent! As long as you have a mountain in your future, and you try to walk towards it, you’ll do A-okay.
I’ve definitely drifted before… it’s hard not to! But it helps to have people holding you accountable!
It’s definitely a human tendency, Liz! I think that’s why we can all relate to it so well. For me, as someone with a Type-A personality, drift is one of my biggest fears. I’m always planning, outlining, and setting goals to prevent it!
I love this. I can tend to drift. Right now, my goal is to take a couple classes while I’m unemployed and that will be accomplished. I’m one that does take things one day at a time though too. I’m happy where I’m at for the most part (wish I didn’t have those medical bills but, what are you going to do right?).
Absolutely, Suzie. Taking things one day at a time is important too—you can’t be living so far in the future that the present falls apart. I think the mountain metaphor becomes important when you’re at a crossroads, in particular. That way, it can help steer you in the right direction.
I’m so glad that you shared this video Jorie; it was very convicting. I had never heard of drifting (prior to reading this) but the concept makes a lot of sense. I definitely think that there are aspects of my life where I tend to drift – mostly work related. One of the questions on Rubin’s quiz asks, ‘Do you often think, “This situation can’t go on,” but then it does go on’ – this is something I wrestle with more often than I’d like to admit. Again, thanks for sharing this. I think drifting is something we all struggle with (some more than others) and even if I don’t change this element of my personality over night, it is definitely something to consider and work towards changing
Absolutely, Di, I am so glad you found a worthy “take-home” message. I took Gretchen Rubin’s quiz and identified with a few of the statements as well, which was a bit of an eye-opener. I think drifting is so universal that we all can’t help but feel its effects at times. But the first step in prevention is awareness, so I think just being _aware_ of the tendency to drift will probably make a ton of difference in the future, going forward. Here’s to a productive 2013!
I love this! I really think I need to keep this in mind, especially when I get caught up in the nitty-gritty-everyday-grind. Thank you for sharing!!
I feel the same way, Rebecca. It’s just nice to remind yourself of what your working toward when the grind is tough—look out to that horizon and see your mountain!
Such a great post! this is a mantra I should probably adopt in the coming months!
Thanks, Laurie! I feel the same way.
I don’t need to do the quiz to know that my entire life has been mostly drifting! I’ve drifted to some incredible places mind you, but I could do with a mountain on the horizon!
Great post Jorie xxxxx
Haha, thank you, Rachel! The good news is, Gretchen Rubin makes a distinction between living a purposeful life with no set-in-stone path and drifting. She said there a lot of free spirits who are not “drifters” by her definition—drifting is simply inaction, or indecisiveness, so you wind up blowing into an unhappy spot and spending too long there. I don’t think that describes you at all, my fearless adventurer!
Thank you for introducing me to Neil! Beautifully inspiring post
Cheers
Choc Chip Uru
I’m so glad, Uru!
Great post Jorie! I will check out that video. I know precisely what my mountain looks like personally, but work wise I’m not quite sure!
That’s great, Kerry, about your “personal” mountain. As for your professional one, you’ll figure it out! You still have plenty of time
Jorie! I loved this post and watched the entire speech. I’ve been thinking a lot about my “mountain” and I think the question of “am I moving towards it or away from it” will become a life long mantra of mine. You’re an inspiration!
Oh, that’s so great to hear, Kit! I feel the same way. Neil Gaiman just has a way of boiling it down to the most simplistic of messages. So inspiring! I see you just started a blog yourself and I can’t wait to follow along too
I bet you’re up to some exciting things, Ms. Morrison!
Holy hell Jorie, this is incredible. Thank you so much for posting!
Thank you so much, Kate!